Screaming! The blood in your veins is cascading like broken dams. Searching! You eyes shot with fear; are lost, looking like a child who lost their parents. Adrenaline has wedged its way into every fiber of your being. If you were to die on the side of the road, you would have no one, you, really have lost all your friends. The puddle of blood is taunting you. Alone! You all alone with the only person you ever cared for. You died on the inside, long ago. When you started running! Running! The calamity of all that is yourself and your running to a blackness suffocating your life as you personality fades into brutality of others. You’re hurting so bad. You hurt so badly. It has everything to do with your running! You’re running from a life of honesty and taking a road of lies. You’re running from everything that asks you to give something of yourself, a lifeless run of panic, because the essence of character makes your quiver. The idea of something wholesome or honest disturbs you. It really is a narcissistic complex. You will not do anything that you do not want to do. You can not see yourself giving to anything that does not benefit you. You don’t hang around somewhere to develop relationships, but, you’ll hang around if you’re being entertained. You call people only when you want something, cleverly, masking the words with genuine motives.
I hurt thinking of the countless things that you have done that disgust me.
I compromised myself. I justified myself. “A quick-temped man does foolish things, and a crafty man is hated.” – Proverbs 14:17. I didn’t let the things you did take traction.
The wretched things that you did looked almost permissible, yet, effectively I’ve put some lenses on that give the clear sight and steadfast judgment to discern unquestionably that your actions are impermissible and without excuse. Sadly moreover, you relish in their malicious effects on others. You are the only reason you lose all your friends. Because people can see that you hurt others, and it does not bother you. But, for the people who have hearts, they care that others are in pain. They also see they can’t remain to associate with a monster.
You’re running! Running! From the love that could fix you and mock my faith as if it wasn’t important to me. You see in me the problems that are so unfair for people to blame faithlessness on. Hypocrite. I am. I am a messed up and broken person. I’m a man with a frailty disposition. But, I’m not the reason that you run!
In all that I’m faulted with from you, I’m not the reason you can’t give into the love.
There is a chase. Someone is running after you. Christ wants to hold you dearly. You’re a child and He wants to take your sins and hold them closely to a cross. You’re not running anymore, your being chased. You don’t have to recognize this for it to be true. You don’t have to believe at all. For Jesus to still want you. It does not matter how far you go. It does not matter how fast you run. He’s not out of reach. It does not matter what you think. It does not matter what you’ve done. He is still not out of reach. He is very much in touch where you’re at.
